HOLY SHIT!!!!! BEST OF 2015!!!!!!!!

Better late than fucking never, and that is the tradition here at Metal Night. 2015 was pretty much a year that shit all over the top of my head. But at least Heavy Metal never let me down. Mostly. This was neither the best nor worst of years for metal. And these are the albums I enjoyed the most. It was a pretty good year for death metal, I must say. Also, these are not in any particular order, except for the number one album, which was far and away my favorite of this year. 

11.Napalm Death-Apex Predator/Easy Meat-Beastly grind from the masters. So good, so varied, so fucking heavy it will fuck your ears off, mate.

10.Iron Maiden-Book of Souls-Here is a big, bloated Maiden album that is way too long, but, otherwise, a great listen. I really hope Maiden puts out an album of concise tune oriented heavy metal, because that is what really works on this album. (Ok, I liked the 20 minute epic, though) And when the are on, they are fucking on. Better than their last two albums, by far.

9.Malevolent Creation-Dead Man's Path-This old warhorse has released their best best album since the old days.They've lightened up the guitar tone, slightly, for an album that is loose, lethal, and thrashy.

8. Krisiun-Forged In Fury-This is a band that doesn't ever really change, or innovate, beyond the brand that they themselves created. So some of their later albums have sounded uninspired. This is not one of those albums. Fucking kills from frist song to last song. Riffs, riffs, evil, and brutality.

7.Gouge-Beyond Death- Gangling, evil, primitive death metal from Hell's Headbangers. Nothing new, but is Repulsion/Possessed/Death worship of the highest order.

6.Extreme Noise Terror-Extreme Noise Terror-These grindcore stalwarts also put out a bastard of an album. Grindy, crusty, meaty, chewy. Good as their old stuff.

5.Endless-Duality of Personality-This ornery sumbitch has everything you want in a brutal technical death metal album. Nice balance between art and ARRRRRRRHHHGGGGGG!!!! Just enough melody and variety to keep things from turning into a riff salad.

4.Deathhammer-Evil Power-Hell's headbangers style old school death thrash. A rollicking affair. Kills your mom just the way you like, even if the bitch is dead.

3.Blind Guardian-Beyond The Red Mirror-This sequel to 'Imaginations from...' is their best album in years. It has all the great and typical BG elements; the bombast, the Teutonicness, with a symphony orchestra tagging along for the grand ride. It's neat.

2.Abyssal-Antikatastaseis-This made a lot of other top 10 lists. Dense, dark, doomy, complicated blackened death metal. Mysterious as fuck and Dark Lord approved. You'll kill yourself thrice it's so nice.

1.Paradise Lost-The Plague Within-Hand down this is my favorite album to come out in 2015; the one I obsessed over; the one whose songs and riff I could not get out of my head. This is a fine example of an old band putting out an album that is in many way superior to their classic albums. This is finely crafted death/doom, folks. Great song writing, memorable riffs, heavy as fuck, a perfect balance of melody and crushing doom, with vocals alternating between clean and demon-sung. Love this album.

Ketchup Post Part Six - The Forever People

Alas, I have returned from my journey to Inter-dimensional Whorehouse of Pancakes and shall now proceed to clean house. Gone are the smooth sounds of German hard rock. Gone are the power metal excursions. Darkness returneth with full force and  resounding fury, but in a slow kind of way cuz my back hurts and I am old. Yup. We brunched the metal death/doom style!

Indeed, the mighty Bloodmace had returned from his adventure in the hell worlds of yon and just one short week later, we joined with Mistress Crowbastard and Vecton the Bard to explore metal from the Philippines. Not content to rest on our laurels with this task, we narrowed it down to the province of Cebu. A hot breeze blew into the sacred listening room and the skulls that festooned the walls began to glow and sing. Welcome to island hell, motherfuckers! 

First up was a motherfucking classic gothic sludge fest in the form of My Dying Bride's debut As The Flower's Wither. This is an epoch crushing sad fest, and one of the heaviest albums in existence. The riffs here laid the foundation for the entire genre. Violin is sparsely yet effectively used, adding an interesting contrast the death metal vocals(which spew college student level dark romantic poetry), as My Dying Bride had not ventured into goth warbling as yet. Fast death metal tempos are employed now and then, so that you may hasten your suicide. Certified classic and the Winner of the Night, cuz I am the Judgement 'n' shit.

A Hero For The World started us off with some competent power metal, although none of the members seem to be Filipino. Despite their dubious background, the music was decent enough, made even better by the incredible shit show that followed. Stallions Of The Burning Church have a name that made me think we were about to hear some faux black metal Hot Topic bullshit but instead tore our minds with their sub-Black Crowes christian hard rock.

Next, Paradise Lost laid down the thickness on their debut, Lost Paradise. This is meat and potatoes death doom.  Genre defining though it maybe, it lacks the elegance of the previous album, delivering old school death metal (with better lyrics than MDB) with slower tempos than usual. It's a great album, though, setting the riff style and basic grim atmosphere that Paradise Lost is known for and expended upon in subsequent albums.

Just when we started thinking there were no good bands in Cebu Province, a squall of feedback and gruff occult lyrics exploded from the speakers. The mighty Astrus came lurching out from the swampy depths of a diabolical marsh, demon swords blazing with impure fire. Things had started to look up for us, then Signos began to play. Fires exploded from the walls and the servants of twilight shambled out into view as the primitive death metal scorched our ears. Winner of the night!

And now for the dark horse. Mournful Congregation's Tears From A Grieving Heart is an elegant, well played funeral doom album that I really did not like. This was mainly because of the whisper vocals splattered through out the album, which I think is more lazy than atmospheric and simply annoys. If you are going to employ faggotty whispers on a fucking metal album, do so like Metallica did on Damage Inc, which was sparingly. Otherwise, you are just trying to be Marilyn Manson, resting your voice between screams because you just can't take it, because you'd rather be having sex with hamsters than laying down some mighty meaty metal vocals at full force and volume. Who cares if you get throat cancer!!!!!!!! Which is really disappointing because otherwise it's really good. But Demon Scourge digresses, and I must make mention that this was his winner of the night. And now I shall slay him with the tiny axe.

 Words of the Elders
On the western shore of Centon, near the kipet mines and the abandoned city, an old man wanders along the beach. His long robes make him seem a monk, but the icy madness behind his eyes shines like a warning beacon. When dusk settles over the ruins he begins to pipe his horrible tunes into the encroaching darkness. One night, as he was regaling the ocean with the lugubrious strains of an evil waltz, something flopped horribly on to the shore. It rolled toward him, a cloudy sac of organs and fluid motivating up from the water. The bizzare orginasim stopped before him and belched up a gilded box from a barely visible orifice on its side. Inside his head, the old man heard a deep voice, "The seven spikes of Necro Baby. You know what you must do." 

Until next week, highway hustlers, 









Horns