Well, last night was fucking crazy because we listened to a bunch of 1980's ers K-tell Metal compilation cassette's. This was the shit they would sell at Meijer's or K-mart for $5 and usually include at a bunch of bands that were only marginally metal. But the best one was the thrashy Metal Meltdown. Released in 1988, featuring a nice mix of thrash, like Anthrax and Exodus, with traditional bands like Judas Priest and Accept, and smattering of hair metal, like Vinnie Vincent Invasion. Whoever slapped this together seemed to have a good sense of what metal actually is, unlike the other douche bags who hurriedly slapped together all those other comps.
The week before we checked out a bunch of blackened doom and Barathrum caught my ear. Their 1997 album Infernal is slow and doomy black metal, a churning cauldron of slow brewing hatred, Bathory meetsCeltic Frost in Darkthrone's rehearsal space. Good shit, is all I've got to say. I strangled a kitten to death while listening to this. That's what black metal is for.
And then previously, we fucked around and listen to some horror themed Metal. Macabre's goofy thrashy death/grind antic won the night. Sinister Slaughter is an early 90's death metal classic. A serial killer themed concept album, it is both entertaining and ripping, with some deft, non-flashy guitar work and a nimble rhythm section. This album jacks off with the entrails of your mom in a charnel house of pain and woe. Whoa!
The sky was bright and clear when
Vecton and I boarded the hovercraft and set on our way to the outpost
of Iron Dan. Gliding across the autumnal landscape of our beloved
Jenkabala, with it's fiery reds and oranges, we silently contemplated
the deeds of this mystic of the north. Son of Parthon the Elder, he
was present at the great battle of Samur, when the Wyvern were
defeated and the last surviving priest of the
T'Chah Karnac was freed
from his prison. He was the warrior who bound Iron James to the
battle jacket in order to contain the fearsome Necro Baby back in the
days of pride. Gray factories whiz by the windows, dark and teeming
with foul mutants who suck the meat from their victims bones with a
chilling screech. When at last we passed from this cursed place into
Abrin, land of aviation and commerce, the sun was sinking below the
horizon and the shadows stretched out to envelop us like great dark
arms. Our craft hummed through the maze of plain stone buildings
until we reached the bunker of the legendary wizard. The oak doors
swing open and there before us is the man himself. Wrapped in the
iridescent cloth of his forefathers, he spoke to us, “Enter
friends, there is much to be done.” Indeed, there was much to be
done, for on this night we were to examine bands from the early days
of Japanese metal. Little did we know it would very nearly cost us
our sanity.
Breaker – Though the “Heroes'
Metal” and “I Wish You to Feel the Great Heavy Metal” demos we
listened to came out, respectively, in '88 and '91, the sound is pure
NWOBHM with, of course, a lot of Accept
influence. Japan has always
been known as a bastion of heavy metal fandom and Breaker is most
definitely a product of that community. The earlier demo showcases a
much less fashionable denim and leather approach to the music, while
the later adds a bit more dimension with longer song structures and
more varied songwriting.
Outrage – Bay area thrash comes to
Nagoya. Probably the most successful band we listened to (certainly
one of the few who made it our of the demo stage.) This EP is
Metallica worship through and through, enjoyable but derivative. I
listened to some of their later material and they seemed to go
mainstream hard rock at some point.
Precious – Power metal anthems with
tasteful synth and a Dio/Dokken feel. I found this album to be a fun,
inconsequential offering. A frothy confection spiced up with some
exciting prog rock elements. According to Metallum, the band was
formed by the Japanese heavy metal label Mandrake Root to promote
their new guitar hero, Akria Kajiyama. This album makes perfect sense
when you consider that one of Kajiyama's later projects, a tribute to
Rainbow, would lead him to a gig as a main collaborator with Joe Lynn
Turner for a good chunk of the early 2000's
Ageless – I get the feeling they are
known more for the unhinged engrish rant on the back of this EP than
the good, Neat Records influenced metal these derelicts banged out
in some unknown studio. Nice, speedy riffage dominates most of the
running time and vocalist Yoshiyuki Nogura pulls off a decent version
of the 'ol heavy metal screech. It's too bad the only thing they put
out after this was a demo from '87 that seems to have slipped through
the cracks of time.
Cry-Max – My pick for band of the
night. There was something about the sneering delivery and the
hateful fuzz guitars of the last track, Abungald Coup d'Etat that
made my ears perk up. When the vocals finally cede to an instrumental
break, the searing synth lead that follows made me lo0se my shit. I'm
not usually one for this type of shenanigans in my metal, but Cry-Max
won my heart from the very first track. Half of the band moved on to
the early visual kai band Gilles de Rais.
With each album, Iron Dan and Vecton
the Bard spun further into madness. Spells were cast with flaming
hands and screams of madness echoed through the night. Ancient
guardians gathered from dimensions unknown to witness the explosive
competition of these weird mortals, each striving to prove his magic
the most powerful. When at last I feared these two would crack open
the very ground upon witch we stood and the enchanted bunker felt as
though it was about to burst from the spiritual energy within, a
familiar voice boomed out, “Hai! What's all this then?” Through
the thick clouds and floating ash, Bloodmace of Waylor strode, cape
billowing out behind him. “Come, Demon Scourge, let us end this
foolish game.” I followed my brother into the fray and at his
signal, we both used the Stryper patches on our battle jackets to
bind the wonton sinners long enough for me to enrapture them with the
Dio emblem. While the dust settles and our friends recover from their
sudden burst of madness, Bloodmace turns toward me, “Good thing I
came back when I did. The last thing we need is another Thrashstone
massacre on our hands. Now let's try some of this excellent Samurian
milk pie before it gets cold”
Horns
